Global Gyan

Random Nuggets of Wisdom :-)

Roof-top Capers

It was another morning. I had not slept much the previous night, having stayed awake to complete a Harry Potter book. My friend had gifted me this big, hardbound book a few days before, and I had reluctantly started reading it. And could not put it down. Unfortunately, it was the middle of the week. I was still new at work and hadn't yet learnt any bunking/goofing off tricks. So I missed the 8.19 to Churchgate (for what else happens when I miss the 8.19, check out: The Day Shahrukh Khan Saved My Life) for the first time.

There's nothing more irritating than seeing the local train leave the platform right in front of your eyes, particularly when the next train on that platform is about ten minutes later, sure to result in the disapproving eye-brow from the big boss. And my project manager had ended the previous evening with a 'let's catch up first thing tomorrow morning' threat of more work. Platform 7 was to offer me no relief, so I proceeded to the overbridge, looking for options. It's easy to generate multiple "strategic options" on a slide but Andheri station, that morning, was in no mood to support my cause.

Back of the envelope calculation revealed that a Slow train after 8.25am would not work; there was no option but to go for a Fast local. I had come to this conclusion even before I had reached the top stair of the bridge, all I had to do now was to go to the correct platform. They don't teach you in b-school not to jump to conclusions too fast, they don't teach you in life too. You have to learn it the hard way, so there I was running fast to catch the next Fast.

All the while, there was a song playing in my head, just refusing to go away. Chaiyya Chaiyaa. With Jhankaar Beats. It had been playing in the auto that brought me to the station and the words looped tunelessly in my mind. It was perhaps coincidental that I was reminded of this song, featuring a train and others, at a train station, but at that time, it was just a background score.

I shall not go into the painful details of how I got into the First Class compartment of the next Fast local: it was from Virar and painfully over-crowded, there were even some chaps sitting on top of the local train! Getting into a Virar-Churchgate local during peak hours was obviously a very stupid thing but such was my dedication to work that I took the chance. Luckily, I did not suffer much physical damage while I was pushed inside; I managed to find some space to stand and held an overhead handle tight. 

Whether it was the gentle swaying of the train or my night-out with Harry Potter, I felt drowsy. Standing. My mind's iPod continued to play Chaiyya Chaiyya in a repeat mode. 

I must admit that I had always been fascinated by that song. Of course, Malaika Arora was mind-blowing and Shahrukh Khan outdid himself in this foot-tapping song, but the most exciting part for me was its picturization on top of a moving train! What a fun way to experience the thrill of a train journey and the beauty of nature all-around. If you had friends with you, some steaming chai and hot pakoras. Aaah! And, yeah, if someone like Malaika was dancing too, then it would be heaven. But, nah! that only happens in movies, so I would settle for the rest. 

I guess my fascination for train-top journeys began in a more sober setting. Ben Kingsley, playing Mohandas Gandhi, joins other passengers on top of a train in his discovery of India journey. What a moment in his realization of what the true India was. Even today, almost 90 years later, hundreds of people travel on train roofs, often because there is no space for them elsewhere but sometimes because it offers the best view, conversations and air conditioning. I had never travelled on a train roof in spite of my several train journeys across India. Wouldn't it be fun to try it out sometime?

My thoughts turned to other famous train roof-top scenes from my favourite movies. Young Indy making his escape from the circus train in Last Crusade and of course, the climax of Mission Impossible. Too much! Well, I could do with less adventure, I suppose. But, the chai and pakoras were a must. 

The train stopped with a sudden shudder. Irritated that my pleasant reverie was disturbed, I opened my eyes and looked around. We had stopped in between stations and there was some commotion from a few compartments away. There was a buzz in ours too. Somebody must have pulled the chain, was the most popular view. Maybe the power has failed, ventured a few others. A couple of guys who were sitting close to where I was could not bear the uncertainty and got up to conduct an inquiry. A few people jumped down from the train and moved towards the source of the noise.

I seized the opportunity and sat down. If that guy returned later, well, it was his fault; he didn't have a reservation for this seat. I retrieved the Economic Times from my bag and looked at the crossword. Why did it have to be in the inner pages and not conveniently in the last one, I cribbed as if that would help me crack more clues! A few minutes passed and the train remained still. Would I lose the Fast train advantage due to this halt? I went back to looking for the anagram clues. Chaiyya Chaiyya continued to compete for attention.

Five or more minutes passed, I reconciled myself to seeing the boss' eyebrows shoot up today; others were also discussing their respective excuses at work. Suddenly there was more buzz, some guys climbed back into the train (quite a feat, that!!) and the train's horn indicated its readiness to resume the journey. Some adventure and a major waste of time, I thought.

The check-shirt guy, surely a broker, whose seat I was occupying did not seem to be in a hurry to reclaim his position. He was in an animated conversation with others standing around him. The buzz in the train refused to die. Unable to hold my curiosity any longer, I looked up and asked, to nobody in particular, 'Kya hua?'  I must have spoken loudly because there was a sudden break in all conversation; the broker heard it and said, "Ek ladka gir gaya train se, abhi zinda hai lekin serious. Shaayad current laga tha, train ke oopar baitha tha." (A boy fell from the train, he's still alive but in a serious condition. Probably electrocuted, he was sitting on the roof.)

Gandhiji, SRK, Indy, Ethan... I am not joining you on the roof, thank you.

This is the fourth in a series of stories from and about train journeys. Other similar stories can be found here.

The Day Shahrukh Khan Saved My Life

For the first two years of my work-life,  8.19 was central to everything. The slow local that originated at Andheri station, to get me to Churchgate, determined how the day would go. If we (some of my colleagues and I) got a seat - at least before Bandra, we would have the opportunity to 'put fight' on the Economic Times crossword, be relaxed enough to get our shoes polished when we disembarked and then reach our Colaba office before the boss did. If we missed the train, then anything could happen. Usually for the worse. 

That fateful morning in April - we were in the midst of appraisals, I remember - I was running late. Every auto, it seemed, was taken. I stood in front of my building, waving at every passing auto. But Juhu Versova Link Road was filled with hundreds and thousands like me, all competing for the 8.19. Most of us were wearing blue or white shirts or blue and white shirts, with dark trousers and black shoes. You would find black or brown leather bags on our shoulders, a few lucky ones just carried a newspaper in their hands. We were all recent MBAs landed in Mumbai with shared accommodation in Andheri and the ambition to move south-wards. We were the 8.19 First Class crowd.

About ten minutes later, I was in an auto, sharing it with some other guy who I only knew as the guy with a discman. He usually sat by himself in the train and listened to music till we reached Churchgate. In tough circumstances such as those of that morning, you made friends with anybody, particularly if the other person was getting into an auto alone. We hardly spoke during the fifteen minute ride to the station; this auto, like many other new ones, was fitted with a tape-player and a T-Series cassette. Kumar Sanu was belting out some old Kishore hits and that was sufficient excuse for us not to engage in conversation.

It was almost 8.15 by the time we reached the Juhu Galli-SV Road junction signal, the final barrier before we hit the entrance to platform 7. The signal had just turned red and we waited impatiently, urging the driver, "Chalo, chalo," almost willing him to break the signal and get ahead. The auto-driver was not really in favour of such heroics at that five-way junction; he fiddled with the springy thing that was hanging from the rear-view mirror. As the signal turned green, Discman and I settled our accounts with the driver and got ready to jump out of the auto. Our three-wheeler, in pole position at the junction, got into the one-way lane towards the station ahead of five others that were vying for the honours. Changing gears, he led the race to the platform entrance. The train stood on the platform.

Having entered the auto later, I was the first to get out. I crossed the road and was climbing the steps when I heard the train horn. The train had decided that it would not wait for me. I did not give up - oftentimes these train drivers would have a false start and be called back to the starting line. And the First Class compartment was right there, in front of me. So I ran.

I glanced backwards to see if the Discman was also giving chase, but he was still at the gate and had obviously given up. The backward glance, as they often say during cricket commentary, lost me two precious seconds and was to prove costly. I was (and am) a tall guy; I was (and am not) quite fit and agile. I decided that I could get into the 8.19 with a bit of effort. Any well-reasoning guy, like Discman, would have told you that it was just not possible; the train was cleared to leave the platform and the motorman, obviously well-fed that bright and sunny morning, was raring to show his moves. He took off with a vengeance. But it was one of those times when reason takes a quick nap to permit perverse foolishness to take over (some call it adrenalin). So I ran faster.

Pushing one or two by-standers, I made a dash for the First Class compartment. It is not very easy to run on any Mumbai suburban platform, particularly when you are wearing formal shoes and have a shoulder bag filled with McKinsey Quarterly and HBR print-outs. However, I was possessed and got pretty close to the compartment door. This is the moment where Hindi movies like DDLJ get it all wrong: you feel that jumping onto a running train and getting hold of a handle is quite easy. I mean, it's been done countless times, and Shahrukh Khan's always around, no? Let me tell you, in case you are planning to attempt a similar stunt in future, that not only is it very difficult to coordinate so many parts of your body and the train at the same time, but it is also very dangerous, given the liberal gap between the train and the platform. So I jumped.

(see 2:00 to 2:30 in this DDLJ video; sorry for the poor quality but it has sub-titles too)

I may have alluded to it earlier, now is the time to clarify that the 8.19 was a very popular train and left Andheri station with 200% capacity utilization. Not much floor space in the train, even in the First Class rake, was left spare for idiots like me. Whereas I was hoping to get my left foot on the train floor and the left hand on the pole that bisected the entrance, said floor and pole were fully accounted for. But like the Light Brigade I had no option to turn back, I was committed. My left shoe made an uninvited entry to the shoe party on the floor; my left hand sought friendship with a strange other. It was a precarious situation, my left limbs were trying to make themselves wanted while most of my body and bag were experiencing loss of gravity. We were now out of Andheri station.

Although nobody outright rejected the intruder, there weren't welcome songs either. Instead of the violins I heard a few people cursing me and my family for my stupidity. Those words probably helped clear my mind and woke reason from its slumber. I was terrified. The sweat in my palms did not help my grip and my foot was still trying to find space for itself. I shifted my body inwards and tried to force my right foot also into the party. At that point, the train shivered a bit as it changed tracks. My hand began to disengage and I knew that something bad was going to happen. He held my wrist and pulled me in. Whether it was extreme-fear induced adrenalin or that guy's strength, I don't know, but two seconds later I found myself mostly inside. My right hand groped for support and found something, my feet too were on something solid. I was breathless and out of my wits for a while. We reached Vile Parle station and more people got in. I managed to stay on my feet, held in place by everyone else around. By the time we got to Bandra, I had been pushed right inside and finally, had some space and air. 

I looked around, remembering that somebody had helped me get in, nay, saved my life. I had no clue who it was, there were too many people all around. I didn't know which one of them was my Shahrukh Khan.

(Title Inspiration: Allan Seally's "How Raj Kapoor Saved My Life")
This is the third in a series of stories from and about train journeys. Other similar stories can be found here.

3 Idiots: Dreams and Reality

NOTE: This is an update to my previous post on 3 Idiots. This one, after seeing the movie today.

 

Follow your dreams. 

That's the key message of 3I (and countless other stories)... and obviously, there's nothing wrong with that message.

But what if you cannot follow your dreams. Circumstances don't let you. What does one do? There are few in this world who are like Rancho (not Aamir Khan, mind you) - inherently brilliant, good-natured and attractive - who are also provided the opportunity to follow their dreams. Remember, it is Mr. Shyamaldas Chanjad who sees Rancho through school and college for his own selfish motive. And unlike Raju Rastogi, Rancho does not have a family of three, surviving on Rs 2500 per month, hoping that their son will get a job and sustain the family's livelihood. 

Every dream clashes with reality, in some way, else it wouldn't be a "dream". Everyone has to make choices, day in and day out, about balancing the two. And given the ephemeral nature of dreams, they can change from time to time, just like reality will. Are we awake to such shifts, are we flexible to adapt to circumstances?

The flaw with 3I (amongst many others that I will not get into here because this is not a movie review) is that it seeks to use a broad brush in favour of the dream-way. With Aamir-can-do-no-wrong-Khan in the lead, all others are reduced to being caricatures. And eventually, all of them bow to the only way of the only master. 

Jahapanaah, Tussi Great Ho!

 

PS: I was shocked at the 'pissing on a live wire' episodes, presented as cool stunts! This used to be a popular ragging sequence in medical colleges, with very dangerous consequences. I just hope that some stupid kids don't try this out for fun!

3 Idiots: Yahaan ka system hi hai kharab!

I haven't seen 3 Idiots yet... but I have read Sahil's review here to get a good sense of what the movie is about.

I will probably watch it soon because it is the movie of 2009/10 and it's supposed to be a well-made movie... I loved Lage Raho Munnabhai and that's enough reason to watch the next Raju Hirani movie.

But I will go into the movie with a prejudice: I don't agree with the "message" that the education system is completely screwed up. That "formal" learning systems or even learning by rote are to be completely discarded. That our educators/professors/teachers are caricatures to be made fun of. That just creativity, without the rigour of analysis, can solve all problems. 

I will not deny that our education system needs a major overhaul. We need to get more practical and more up-to-date. But that does not mean we kill the system itself. Remember, it is the same system that has produced whatever it has till now. It is the same system that has ensured that India grew at 8% this year when most "developed" countries were reeling with recession. It is the same system that is slowly leading to the flattening of the population pyramid. 

Yes, the ranking system forces unhealthy competitive behaviour amongst children and we need to find ways to make "selection" more rounded and not just limited to "exam results". But, at the end of the day, can we get away from the fact that there will be "selection"? Humans are what they are because of natural selection. We have chosen capitalism as our way of life; to wish that everyone be alike is just a wish.

My daughter is just learning her 2-times table. She often forgets what she learnt "by rote"... but her learning process also taught her that she can add two to the previous answer to get the next one. And so on for the 3-times and 4-times tables. So she is using some creativity to get to the answer when she is stuck. Eventually, it won't matter whether she knows 4X9=36 by rote or by a creative deduction of the answer. She will know it. And she needs to know it. That's the problem with formal education... it is a somewhat painful process when we go through it and it is easy to discredit what we have learnt. But if we hadn't learnt many of those things, where would we be today? 

What the system lacks is the flexibility for people to find their interest areas and to be able to customize their higher education in a way that suits their interests. We are stuck with rigid definitions of education options: Science, Commerce or Arts after the 10th; Engineering, Computers, Commerce, Science or Arts after the 12th... Why not a mix of them? Why can't an Engineering major do a bit of Arts and Commerce to develop other perspectives? Or the other way around...

The problem that I have with these movies (TZP, 3I, MB-MBBS) is that the studious are caricatured as nerds and the creative/dreamy types as studs. The teachers have to be of the worst category possible, except of course if Aamir is the teacher himself. The world needs the engineers, accountants, scientists, managers or other nerdy types as much as it needs the poets, photographers, artists, singers or the filmy types. Remember, the smart alec had the opportunity to come up with the fundoo "pencil, not pen" choice only because several brilliant mathematicians, scientists and engineers at NASA applied a lot of theorems, equations, algebra, design, etc. to build a craft that would take humans to space.

Tomorrow, I will surely enjoy 3 Idiots and all the funny / senti moments and the twists that are promised in the movie. But on Monday, I will also insist that my six-year old learn her 2 to 5 tables by rote. 

I hate AB for making me cry so much on a Sunday afternoon #paa

... and laugh too!

There are very few films that I don't crib about - something or the other. Obviously perfect movies are hard to come by. An hour after leaving the theater, I can't find anything in Paa to crib about. Except that it made me laugh loud and cry louder. In public. On a Sunday afternoon. Like Leela, my 6yr old, said while giving the movie a standing ovation, Can we get the dvd and watch it at home again!